Haemorrhoids and sex – They are small, sometimes invisible from the outside and cause a real massacre in the loo. We are, of course, talking about haemorrhoids, which effect around one in two people after the age of 50. The good news first: Haemorrhoids are not caused by fucking. Some people like to claim this, but it is simply wrong.
There are many reasons for the annoying cauliflower on your bum, but your partner’s cock is not one of them. If you’re wondering whether you can still get off with those annoying things, don’t worry. You can – we’ll tell you how!
Do I have haemorrhoids? How you can recognise the stools
First of all, everyone has haemorrhoids, including you. The term is used to describe the cushions that are located at the end of your bowel in the anus. This is a swelling that is not noticeable in its basic function. Haemorrhoids only become noticeable when they swell excessively. Doctors then speak of a haemorrhoidal disease.
Typical symptoms of this are:
- Standing burning around and in your bum
- Bleeding (after sex, for example)
- Itching that can hardly be alleviated
The doctor categorises haemorrhoids into four degrees of severity. This is important in order to find the best possible treatment so that you can get your arse fucked again soon.
- Grade 1: You can’t see them, you can’t feel them, but they are already enlarged. Internal haemorrhoids can become acutely noticeable if they have been particularly irritated and supplied with blood during fucking or playing with a dildo.
- Grade 2: The enlargement is more advanced, they sometimes protrude from the arsehole when pumping or on the loo. Don’t worry, at this stage they also retract on their own.
- Grade 3: Now your haemorrhoids are having fun in the daylight and often pop in for a visit. It may take a little effort, but you can push them back in with your finger.
- Grade 4: At this stage, nothing can help, the haemorrhoids are permanently hanging out and are visible. If you don’t act now, anal prolapse is possible. This not only causes the swelling to protrude, but also a piece of your anal mucosa.
Prevent rather than treat – what you can do against haemorrhoids
You’re probably still struggling at the thought that everyone has haemorrhoids. Don’t worry about it, with a few simple changes to your everyday life you can prevent unnecessary growth.
Once again: Sex or even the use of butt plugs have no negative influence on the growth of piles. Some gays are even firmly convinced that regular anal massage is suitable for prevention. Whether this is really true has not been scientifically proven. But one thing is clear: Whether it’s a well-groomed rim job or a hot fuck from your lover – the arsehole can make you damn happy! To keep it that way, simply prevent annoying piles. We’ll give you five tips on how to do this:
1. include anus-friendly food in your diet
Do you sit on the loo for fifteen minutes but spend 90% of the time wiping? That’s a clear sign that you’re not eating optimally. The proverbial “gluten sausage” actually has nothing to do with happiness, but shows that your digestion is working well.
In order to prevent haemorrhoids, smooth bowel movements are important. Constipation causes the swelling to grow faster, and you may soon get a visit from your arsehole. Fibre is your magic word if you want to keep your bowel movements healthy and smooth.
Here are a few examples of what should be on your anal-friendly menu:
- Flaxseed and sesame
- Wholemeal pasta
- Cereals and oatmeal without sugar
- Fruit and vegetables
- Flea seed husks
Important: Avoid laxatives, even if they provide quick relief. It is only helpful if your doctor advises it.
2. swallow, you slut – but please do it properly
The sperm fountain from your lover’s cock is of course much tastier than water, but the latter makes for a healthy arsehole. If your body is well hydrated, you can prevent constipation. By switching to more fibre, you absolutely need the liquid. It helps with swelling in the bowel and makes the stool smooth. It is best to drink water or make yourself a tea without sugar. If you fancy a bit of flavour, mix a pineapple juice with sparkling water. Incidentally, this also contributes to a great sperm flavour.
3. don’t just move around in bed
When you’re fucking, you’re on 180 and really let it rip, but otherwise the sofa is your best friend? Get your everyday life going so you don’t give piles a chance. If you already have them, avoid weightlifting and other physical exertion, otherwise your unwelcome friends will soon be peeking out of your rosette.
Tip: Check out alternative sports techniques such as yoga and Pilates. Not only are they relaxing, but they are also kind to your backside.
4. wash your bum with oil
Hygiene is important after going to the loo – after all, you always want to be prepared for a spontaneous rim job. It’s also good for your skin if you cleanse yourself thoroughly but gently. Avoid hard toilet paper, which puts pressure on your anal mucosa. An anal douche works better or a damp flannel with a mild soap (without perfume).
For an extra dose of care: To keep your bum supple, dab it with olive oil. Use a purified pharmacy product, as this promotes the elasticity of your bum.
5. pull down your trousers – at your doctor
When you go to the doctor, do you prefer to keep your trousers on when you’re with your lover? But that doesn’t help, because prevention is better than reaction. Does your backside burn, itch, or do you feel constant pressure? The right place to go in these cases is a proctologist. They can tell at a glance whether your anal cushions are swollen. In the beginning, ointments help wonderfully and prevent you from having permanent symptoms or even needing an operation later on.
Conclusion: Prevent piles and have a pleasurable fuck
Now that you know that piles are not caused by your lover’s cock, you’ll feel more relaxed during sex, won’t you? However, a little “aftercare” is still important in everyday life. Even if wild sex is not to blame, more and more gays are affected by haemorrhoids as they get older.
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