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Do you feel an intense thrill when someone ties you up and takes control during sex? Does it turn you on to dominate someone through erotic bondage? If so, you’re likely a fan of bondage. If you’re new to this, we’ve put together helpful beginner tips on bondage and introduce you to 14 arousing bondage positions for gays.
What is Bondage?
The English term “bondage” literally translates to “servitude,” “submission,” “confinement,” “bondage,” or “restraint.” These translations hint at what bondage is all about. Bondage is a sexual practice within BDSM, which stands for Bondage, Discipline (or Dominance), Submission, Sadism, and Masochism.
In gay relationships, bondage is about control, power, dominance, and submission (though these dynamics are found in heterosexual relationships too). It’s an erotic way of playing with authority and control on one side, and dependency and possession on the other. Bondage is a form of role-play. The primary arousal in bondage comes from limiting movement through often elaborate, sensual restraints.
Bondage Positions for Gays You Should Know
There are many bondage techniques for gay men, so you and your partner have the freedom to try whichever of the following tips appeal to you. For the first four tips, all you’ll need are handcuffs, ankle cuffs, ropes, and/or tape. Later on, we’ll explore using furniture in bondage play and some hot blowjob positions.
1. Mirror of Desire
This position is essentially the classic missionary, allowing the dominant partner to penetrate deeply during anal sex. The bottom lies on their back, with ankles bound together and lifted. The top kneels, resting the bottom’s ankles on either shoulder, making thrusting easy. This position is especially enticing for foot fetishists, as the bottom’s feet are always within reach for smelling or licking.
2. Aquarius Position
A slight twist from the Mirror of Desire moves your submissive partner to lie on their side in a semi-fetal position. This allows for penetration from the side, perfect for spanking or disciplining the bottom’s thighs.
3. Side-by-Side or Spoon Position
The partner is tied at the ankles (and possibly wrists), lying on their side with knees drawn to the chest. The dominant partner lies behind and thrusts from the side. Known as spooning, the third of our bondage positions for gays is popular for anal play among BDSM enthusiasts.
4. Legs Up, Wrists to Knees
This position allows for deep penetration. The submissive partner lies on their back with legs extended upward. Their wrists are bound near their knees (athletic subs may have wrists tied to ankles).
5. Chair Restraint
A sturdy chair with armrests and a back is all you need. Seat your partner, tying their wrists to the armrests and ankles to the chair legs. Tease them with a striptease, moving your body close enough for them to lick and kiss.
6. Bent Over the Chair
Ideal for master-servant role-play, the submissive partner bends over a chair without armrests, chest on the seat, knees on the floor, wrists tied to the chair legs. In this position, they’re ready for spanking, whipping, or other erotic play, and may also be open to vibrators or anal toys.
7. Spread Eagle
For the seventh of our bondage positions for gays, you’ll need a bed with posts or a metal frame. The bottom lies face down, with arms and legs spread and bound to the bedposts. This position allows for full surrender to the Dom and is ideal for sensory play with tickling, scratching, or flogging. A power bottom might reverse the role, tying the dominant partner face up to the bed and riding them.
8. Zeus Position
Perfect for bondage fans who enjoy eye contact during oral play. The sub kneels on a cushion with hands tied behind their back. The Dom stands in front, savoring the sounds as the sub deep-throats.
9. Crab Tie
This position is a fun twist on the 69. The bottom lies on their back with their head hanging off the bed. Pull their knees to their chest and tie their calves to their forearms. The Dom kneels in front of the bed, allowing easy face-fucking.
10. Frog Legs Position
For those interested in a “genital buffet,” tie the bottom’s ankles to their thighs. First, bind their arms behind their back, then pull their feet close to their rear and secure ankles to thighs. The tenth of our bondage positions for gays allows for intense oral play, prostate massage, and cum control.
11. Hogtie
The sub is completely immobilized in this position, lying face down with hands behind their back and feet near their rear. Tie all four limbs together. This gives the Dom total control, able to hold the sub’s head and dictate depth and pace. Start slow, allow breathing pauses, and always use a safe word or signal. Safety first!
12. Butt Up
The bottom kneels on all fours with legs spread, butt raised in the air, head resting on a pillow, and arms positioned between their legs. Using a spreader bar, bind wrists and ankles together. In this position, they’re ready for thrilling rimming sessions.
13. Sling King
In a sex swing, your sub is prepared for long sessions. With hands and feet spread wide, they lie back in the sling, ready to please the Dom however they wish.
14. Arm Binder with Gag
The last of our bondage positions for gays combines a ball gag with wrist restraints. The sub wears a ball gag strapped to the head, connected to wrist cuffs behind the back. Lying face down, they’re set for any erotic “torment” desired.
Learning Safe Bondage Techniques
Safety is paramount, and a sub should focus on their Dom’s pleasure, not on painful or dangerous restraints. A Dom should master rope techniques, as improper bindings can cause serious injury, damage nerves, or create blood clots that could lead to heart attacks or strokes. To learn more about bondage and expand your skills, consider taking a class or seeking guidance from experienced BDSM practitioners.
And now have fun trying our 14 bondage positions for gays!
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