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Men with mental health problems still often try to “self-treat” rather than seeking professional help or finding support in a men’s group. In the worst cases, they turn to alcohol, drugs, or excessive exercise to escape their problems. Some attempt to solve issues by burying themselves in work. Unfortunately, these coping strategies are rarely successful and often risk worsening the problem. This article explores whether and how a men’s group can assist with mental health issues.
What Mental Health Issues Affect Men?
Studies show that many gay men experience mental health problems due to their life situations. Causes of these issues might include sexual conflicts (e.g., rejecting their own homosexuality or struggling with coming out), violence in or outside relationships (as victims or perpetrators), experiences of discrimination or bullying related to their sexual orientation (e.g., workplace homophobia), or relationship problems. Additionally, factors like HIV infection or loneliness in old age can lead to mental health issues such as depression, social anxiety, or obsessive-compulsive disorders.
The symptoms of mental health problems can vary greatly. Some men display unusual irritability, others have sudden anger outbursts, and some exhibit increased risk-taking behavior. The toll on men with mental health issues is reflected in national suicide statistics. In 2023, approximately 10,300 people nationwide died by suicide, with men accounting for three-quarters of these deaths. Mental illnesses are suspected to be a major cause in most cases.
Unfortunately, many men still harbor reservations about professional counseling or therapy. Outdated gender roles persist when it comes to mental health: men are expected to be tough, avoid showing vulnerability, and rely solely on logic. When men display emotions, express sadness, or cry, they are often labeled as “unmanly.” Mental illnesses, like depression, are viewed as signs of weakness and do not fit the traditional masculine image.
Men’s Groups as a Low-Threshold Option
Gay men with mental health problems often struggle to consult a psychologist because doing so feels like revealing their vulnerabilities. Booking an appointment, involving health insurance, and encountering strangers in a waiting room can make the experience feel like an external admission of weakness. Once at the psychologist’s office, many men initially focus on physical symptoms to avoid addressing the real issue. Although society increasingly accepts psychotherapy, there is a need for less intimidating, low-threshold options. For this reason, men’s groups for nearly every mental health issue have been established nationwide.
A self-help men’s group is such a low-threshold option. In Munich, for example, the Gay Communication and Cultural Center Sub e.V. offers self-help groups for issues such as Gay 40+, Chemsex, family, alcohol, depression and burnout, and trans matters.
Men’s groups are low-threshold because they are usually easy to access. The groups publish the time and location of their meetings, allowing you to simply attend and observe. If the group does not feel right for you, there is no obligation to return.
In a thematic men’s group, such as one for men with relationship problems, you meet others who are in similar situations and can understand what you’re going through. The primary goal of the group is to provide a safe space where members can openly discuss their challenges. Since all participants have had similar experiences and are at different stages of coping, mutual support is possible.
Men’s Groups as a Gateway to Professional Counseling
Men’s groups are usually organized and led by someone with personal experience in mental health issues. Such a leader can often provide helpful information about finding professional counseling if you realize the group is beneficial but additional support is needed to better understand and overcome your problems. In this way, a men’s group can be a step toward fully addressing mental health issues.
The members of a men’s group, thanks to their personal experiences, are often sensitive to the specific challenges involved. This enables them to realistically assess your situation and offer appropriate feedback. If necessary, they may encourage you to seek additional help from a psychologist or therapist alongside the group.
Don’t Take Mental Health Problems Lightly
Do you recognize yourself in the above information? If so, don’t take potential mental health issues lightly. They can increasingly burden your daily life and drain your energy. Take advantage of the support a men’s group can offer. The group, or even individual members, can act as a safety net to catch and support you.
Openly discuss what is troubling you, as in this case, silence is not golden—speaking is. Simply voicing your thoughts and having someone listen and understand can bring significant relief. Exchange experiences with people in similar situations. Knowing you are not alone in your struggles can be encouraging. Let the small or big success stories of other group members motivate you to face your problems head-on. Use the group to find further support options, such as contact information for experienced therapists or psychologists. Some of your group members may already be in therapy and can recommend helpful experts.
Finding Men’s Groups
Gay men with mental health issues can usually find resources in the LGBTQIA+ community in their city. Men’s groups for gay men are often affiliated with urban queer centers, if such exist. Larger cities may even have coordination offices for LGBTQ+ lifestyles, where flyers about men’s groups might be available.
For younger gay individuals, there are also queer youth centers, which often host specific men’s groups for teenagers or young adults. This allows you to meet peers with similar problems without having to join a group of much older participants. Such age differences could negatively impact group dynamics and your comfort level.
Conclusion: Men’s Groups as a First Point of Contact
If you have mental health problems but are hesitant to consult a psychologist or therapist right away, a men’s group can be a valuable first step. Ideally, the positive experiences gained in the group can encourage you to seek expert help to identify causes and discover solutions. If you continue attending the group, you may even be able to support others with your own experiences.
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